Tuesday, March 16, 2010

As Time Flies By

We used to sit on her porch and talk until six, sometimes seven into the bright summer morning - quoting Simpsons and laughing together about the random events of the previous evening and the strange things that happened within our particular group of friends. We were "regulars" for the night shift workers at the local 24-hour coffee shop, where we would get slightly stale, but very free bagels and other baked goods when their new orders came in overnight.

Walking to go get a much-needed haircut a few days ago, I bumped into her again, as she was picking up her son from the local kindergarten.

I had met her son before, a year or so earlier. He calls me "robrob" now. I quite like it. Seeing my close friend walk her progeny back from school that day though, it hit me: my friend whom I used to mock the coupled masses with, was married, with a baby, now a child. It's probably my fault, to be fair. When she asked me back in 2003 whether she should date this guy from her college class who had shown an interest in her, I said she should go for it. In my defence, I had no idea my approval of this hopeful young man would lead to this - me being the unwitting instigator of a life-long relationship including children. Children! How does this work? I mean, well I know the basics. Seeing friends with children is still terrifying to me, though. Because here I am, a 26-year-old man, hobbling into the dark unending abyss of adulthood: a place where you're supposed to "settle down", get married and have little versions of you, you 2.0, and I still struggle with basic skills they teach you in adult training camp, like cooking and laundry and not yelling at your brother when he clearly cheats at Mario Kart. Who knew Wario was so fast?

I'm hoping there will be a day soon where everything just clicks into place and I start becoming more mature ; because soon it might be time for “robrob” to put down his videogames and hop into the abyss - terrified, yet hopeful. Mostly terrified.


Allison said...

Having kids and settling down doesn't equal adulthood.

What is that anyways? Don't feel like you aren't where you should be because you don't have a rugrat or god forbid a "wifey." - and you know how I hate that word.

kisekae said...

Your future gf/wife may hate me for this but don't give up the videogames! I don't believe that growing up necessarily means we need to stop doing the things we have fun doing!

Being married and having kids is overrated anyhow :)

...coming from a single and perhaps slightly bitter girl.

CuppyCakes said...

I intend to live like Peter Pan forever and simply not ever grow up. Only I won't be able to fly.
I almost said the same things in my last blog...

Proud Maisie said...

I am 29. I can tell you that some adult-things do seem to just click. However, I am the woman who, everytime she buys some lovely new bedlinen, secretly smiles to herself and says "Tee-hee, wow this feels so grown-up".
As for the settling down, it doesn't mean doing it cookie-cutter style. I would love to get married, but I fully expect my husband to want to party like it's 1999, play video games with me, and dance around with pants on his head.

Anonymous said...

this entry really resonated with me... i'm 25, and am barely scraping by in terms of adulthood. marriage and kids? out of the question.

The Mad Hatter said...

First off, thanks for your kind words. Secondly, do not discredit yourself. You have a certain eloquence with your words that is uncommon for this day and age.